1. I am a better Bishop now that I am not a Bishop than I was when I was a Bishop, a better Stake President now that I am not a Stake President than I was when I was a Stake President, and if you talk to me in 10 years, I will be a better Mission President then than I was when I was a Mission President!!!
2. Most of the times when I asked missionaries if they knew why I was calling them, they confessed to something completely different than the reason why I was calling them!
3. The reason I have such a stern look on my face when you tell me that you did something knuckle-headed is because I would probably burst out laughing if I was not your Mission President.
4. Most missionaries who tell me to expect emails from their parents are correct.
5. When you tell a missionary, "I am going to tell you something but do not tell the Mission President", you are really saying, "I am going to tell you something and I realize that you are probably going to tell the Mission President". That is why you are not surprised and sometimes relieved when the Mission President knows...and you do not ask, "How did you know?"!
6. You can not play a Mission President's wife off of the Mission President. She is too smart for that and has already raised children into adulthood.
7. The Kleenex box on the Mission President's desk is used more often by him
than by visitors to his office.
8. If your Mission President is speaking a language other than english to you, you probably should not be speaking english to him...even if you both know english.
9. It really is fun for the Mission President to just be with missionaries in their
areas working and visiting and talking...and he wants the missionaries to enjoy it, too.
10. Sometimes the reason we know something you do not is because we have the Manuals of Instruction where we can look it up!!!
And the bonus confession...Sometimes the Mission President is just as surprised by what he sees as you are to see him walk through your apartment door!